“Like a compass needle that points north, a man’s accusing finger always finds a woman.” [pg. 7]I found that this quote appropriately displays the views of Taliban men toward women. This was an unnecessary reality that the female characters from the book had to face, and unfortunately many women in several different societies must succumb to this ideology.
"There is only one, only one skill a woman like you and me needs in life, and they don't teach it in school. Look at me... Only one skill, and it's this: tahamul. Endure." [pg. 17]This excerpt was sort of jarring for me; the women living in Afghanistan at the time were forced to do just that: endure. However, the fact that a mother would teacher her daughter to remain quiet and not defend herself, to me, is appalling. My mother has always taught me to defend and respect myself, and stand up for my individual freedom, because of this I am left upset by the fact that many girls and women are not taught such things.
"Mariam lay on the couch, hands tucked between her knees, watched the whirlpool of snow twisting and spinning outside the window. She remembered Nana saying once that each snowflake was a sigh heaved by an aggrieved woman somewhere in the world. That all the sighs drifted up the sky, gathered into clouds, then broke into tiny pieces that fell silently on the people below. As a reminder of how people like us suffer, she'd said. How quietly we endure all that falls upon us." [pg. 30]This is another quote that focuses on the amount of women all over the world who are forced to endure whatever harm comes their way. Not only in Afghanistan, but in every country, and every neighbourhood. This is an on going issue in the world that has been around for centuries and is one that is often times 'swept under the rug.' To me, this issue should not be over looked at all, and I would certainly like to see and take part in educating societies on women's rights.
"One could not count the moons that shimmer on her roofs, or the thousand splendid suns that hide behind her walls." [pg. 172]This is quoted in the book from a poem written in the seventeenth century, written about Kabul. First, I thought it contained beautiful imagery. I thought it was an odd way to describe the character's home in Afghanistan, as it was filled with devastation.
"A society has no chance of success if its women are uneducated..." [pg. 103]I found an effective amount of truth to this quote. Not only does a society have no chance of success if its women are uneducated, but if all of its people are uneducated. This is proven in countries all over the world that have faced various wars and genocides. I find the fact that the Taliban believe that women should be uneducated to be ridiculously close-minded, and a little bit naive. Such prejudices often lead to downfall.
"Of all the hardships a person had to face, none was more punishing than the simple act of waiting." [pg. 113]In a general sense, this quote would probably be relatable to anyone. Out of context, it applies to a little girl waiting for the arrival of her father. However, I feel as though this line provided foreshadowing for the rest of the book; many abused women have experienced the anxiety of having to wait and anticipate not only when their abuse will stop, but when they will next have to face a horrible experience.
"Miriam wished for so much in those final moments. Yet as she closed her eyes, it was not regret any longer but a sensation of abundant peace that washed over her. She thought of her entry into this world, the harami child of a lowly villager, an unintended thing, a pitiable, regrettable accident. A weed. And yet she was leaving the world as a woman who had loved and been loved back. She was leaving it as a friend, a companion, a guardian. A mother. A person of consequence at last. No. It was not so bad, Miriam thought, that she should die this way. Not so bad. This was a legitimate end to a life of illegitimate belongings."This was a part of the book that really touched me. One of the main characters, Miriam, had had such an incredibly horrible life and the fact that in the last moments of her life she was able to be optimistically retrospective of only the positive experiences she had faced throughout her life, although the majority of her experiences were full of abuse and terror. As someone who accepted her ultimate fate in such a noble way for the safety of her new family, she deserved to experience whatever bliss possible in the last thoughts she had.
"Laila has moved on. Because in the end she knows that’s all she can do. That and hope."This quote would also apply to the abused woman. Laila has accepted the horrid aspects of her life, realized that nothing would change unless she came to her own defense, and took action to save herself and those she cared about. By killing Rasheed, she removed any possibility of danger that her family could be subject to, and in her and my eyes it was the right thing to do. Considering the customs and beliefs of the society and culture of Afghanistan at the time of the story, this man would have ultimately killed his family and those that Laila loves, whether it be through murder, driving them to suicide, or placing blame that would lead to death pursued by the government. Laila and Miriam want their children to receive the opportunity to have a healthy future, and have as little negative affects from abuse as possible. Considering that women were not respected (and still aren't, to a large degree) in Pakistan at the time they would have not been offered counseling or a way out, as they would in North America.
"That summer, Titanic fever gripped Kabul. People smuggled pirated copies of the film from Pakistan- sometimes in their underwear. After curfew, everyone locked their doors, turned out the lights, turned down the volume, and reaped tears for Jack and Rose and the passengers of the doomed ship. If there was electrical power, Mariam, Laila, and the children watched it too. A dozen times or more, they unearthed the TV from behind the tool-shed, late at night, with the lights out and quilts pinned over the windows.
At the Kabul River, vendors moved into the parched riverbed. Soon, from the river's sunbaked hollows, it was possible to buy Titanic carpets, and Titanic cloth, from bolts arranged in wheelbarrows. There was Titanic deodorant, Titanic toothpaste, Titanic perfume, Titanic pakora, even Titanic burqas. A particularly persistent beggar began calling himself 'Titanic Beggar.'
'Titanic City' was born.
It's the song, they said.
No, the sea. The luxury. The ship.
It's the sex, they whispered.
Leo, said Aziza sheepishly. It's all about Leo.
'Everybody wants Jack,' Laila said to Mariam. 'That's what it is. Everybody wants Jack to rescue them from disaster. But there is no Jack. Jack is not coming back. Jack is dead.'" [pg.270]First, I felt that this part of the book was significant due to the fact that the people of this community are faced with such hardships, they search for whatever luxuries and satisfying distractions they can to take away from the discrepancies in their lives. Titanic is a story that many people all over the world love to romanticize about, and if gives many people with less than desirable life situations hope for feeling that kind of compassion. This is reflected when Laila says, "Everybody wants Jack... Everybody wants Jack to rescue them from disaster." However, when she contradicts, "But there is no Jack. Jack is not coming back. Jack is dead." her perception of reality is displayed. This shows that she has come to an acceptance of her fate and feels the inevitability of her abuse, leading her to the desire for change.
"Inside Laila too a battle was being waged: guilt on one side, partnered with shame, and, on the other, the conviction that what she and Tariq had done was not sinful; that it had been natural, good, beautiful, even inevitable, spurred by the knowledge that they might never see each other again."This was a quote from earlier on in the book when Laila loses her virginity to her childhood love (and later on husband), Tariq. I thought that this quote showed glimpses of the aspects that Afghanistan's youth need to grasp, in order to not be subject to such harsh societal conditions. Her opinion on having sex with him though they were young and not married was a personal opinion, one that the women of Afghanistan should be free to express, as they generally are in North America.
Relevance of the Title
In the beginning of the book, Laila's Babi recites a poem to her written about Kabul: "One could not count the moons that shimmer on her roofs. Or the thousand splendid suns that hide behind her walls." One would consider this description of Afghanistan to be a juxtaposition since its society is/was facing such despair, however, later on in the book one would realize that in Laila's reminiscence there were a few parts of her life that reflect the imagery of the poem; Miriam. Many residents of Kabul would be able to look past the tortured exterior and see that it remains a place to find love, support and happy aspects of life, just as Laila was able to discover in Miriam; for many, this would be considered a consolation or solace amongst the devastation life may impose. Controversial Issues
There are several controversial issues that this book discusses. Some of these issues include: the infliction of basic female and human rights, domestic and sexual abuse, sex before marriage, freedom to choose one's spouse and/or direction in life, and the general, biased laws that the Taliban inflicted upon the people under their leadership.
In the beginning of the book, the issue of forced marriage is more prominently discussed. When Miriam, the first main character introduced, is married to her father's much older friend Rasheed, I felt an instant discomfort for her, as she was unable to protest and have a choice in to whom she was married. Along with this came her rape. At the time, and to a degree to this day, the women in Afghanistan (and many other middle-eastern countries) were taught that correct behavior for a respectable woman was to serve their husband and obey every one of their desires, meaning that when the husband wanted sex, he got it, regardless of whether or not it was forced or consensual. To read of a barely teenage, defenseless girl being forced into sexual abuse by a 40 year old man, to me was shocking. The ignorance many men in power display toward the rights of women and people who they consider to be beneath them just shows how selfish and uneducated many people are in this world.
Laila experiences the possibilities of defiance when she has loses her virginity to Tariq when she is not married to him. This act was controversial because, as in many communities, sex before marriage is frowned upon in Afghanistan. If anyone had discovered that this had happened, or that Laila's first child was in fact Tariq's, not Rasheed's, she would have faced dire consequences.
As in real life, the wives in the book were subject to domestic abuse. In fact, all forms of abuse discussed in this book are the forced practices of the Taliban, and men are not encouraged to consider otherwise. This in itself is probably the most controversial aspect of the book.
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